Style

Style

I don’t have a sense of style. Maybe I do, but it is best described as “bad”. This is what I wear to work: Dockers (black or olive), low hiking boots, white dress shirt with button down collar (top button is always undone. Note I have to buy dress shirts on-line because I defy you to try and find a 15-35 shirt in Canada’s second fattest city), skinny 60s vintage tie (garage sales, vintage clothing shops, dead grandfather’s closet) and tie clip. I also have a hair cut that looks like Pee Wee Herman with side-burns. I used to shave my head, but I found that my “Death Camp Chic” look may have been career limiting. Let’s just assume for a moment that the “Pee Wee look” isn’t. I keep in my ear-ring (I got it when I was 17 at Eaton’s in The Midtown Plaza in Saskatoon) to offset my little round glasses, it confuses people, and to show that I am unafraid to be different, just like everybody else. Sometimes, I wear a suit. Invariably it is 3 button, narrow legs, slim fitting and made in the 60s. I desperately want to believe that it makes me look very “Rat Pack” but I know deep down that it makes me look like somebody who shouldn’t be allowed to dress himself. All in all, I look very “White”. But I know that. How do I know I’m white? Easy, I own 2 Rush CDs: “2112” and “Farewell to Kings”. Ok, I own 3 Rush CDs if you include “All the World’s a Stage” which was an ITunes download. Originally, it was not included in “own” because I didn’t go through the soul rendering process of taking it to a check-out counter and proclaiming to the world my “whiteness” and lack of style.

I want my old jeans back. There, I said it. Unlike the guy in the Diet Pepsi commercial, I looked good in my old jeans. Mary and my daughter, Marit, will probably disagree with me, here. They were the ones who stole all of my narrow jeans and took me shopping at American Eagle to buy baggy, adult jeans. It was sort of like an episode of “What Not To Wear” but without the gay guy. Now I have baggy jeans that 2 or 3 of me can fit in. The upside is that I can work on my “Home Boy” persona: DJ Darnell J-Stone. Of course, my Home Boy persona is about as menacing as my pro-wrestling persona: “Shower Boy” with his 2 signature moves: “The Prance of Danger” and the “Towel Flick of Doom”. I want my old jeans back. I know they are in the house someplace. I think the world would be a better place if I had my old jeans back.

I took my 2 sons (Erik and Anders) to see Heaven and Hell (Black Sabbath with Dio) and Megadeth in March. Mary asked how the concert was; Erik and Anders said the Megadeth was “awesome”. My review consisted of 6 words “I want my old jeans back”.

Outside of my old jeans, I’m also a tad miffed that I can’t find any running clothes in Canada’s second fattest city in size small. I hold Hal Higdon and John Stanton personally responsible for this. Men’s split shorts are also an online only purchase for me….unless I buy women’s which has been known to happen, purely out of frustration. I mentioned this to Deb, the Wednesday night bike nazi, who part-times at a local running store. The conversation went like this:

“Deb, why don’t you carry sizes in running clothes that fit the stature of someone of who, let’s just say for the sake of argument, runs a lot?” She just told me to shut up. Maybe the world is trying to tell me that it doesn’t want to see my chicken legs in anything but baggy basket ball type running shorts. In any case, I’m going to keep very close tabs on my few remaining pairs of running shorts. I’m worried that they may go the way of my old jeans……which I want back.

Oh yeah, the training stuff:

Feb 5 – 11

Run 40 miles

Bike 100 miles

Swim 3k

Feb 12-18

Run 58 miles

Bike: 152 miles

Swim 1.5k

Feb 19-25

Run 62 miles

Bike 152 miles

Swim 1.5k

Feb 26- Mar 4

Run 70 miles

Bike 180 miles

Swim 3k